The Japan Files ~ Life Lessons

So, I've just crossed the 18 month marker for my duration in Japan and as with all of my experiences, I often take a moment to evaluate myself and how far or otherwise I have managed to come. It isn't always apparent but some experiences have a way of changing people, whether it amplifies already present qualities, eradicates them or creates different ones all together. It'll be interesting when I visit home later on this year to see how the people closest to me reckon I've changed, but for the time being, all I can do is take a good look at myself and decide what Japan has done for me, or done to me.

"I like knowledge"

History. Culture. Language. Society. While all of these things have always been accessible, with social-networking so prevalent, I can access these at the click of a button. If someone says a word I don't know, rather than asking them to explain, I can quickly Google away and find out something for myself. At night, after a hard day's grind, it isn't uncommon for me to cycle through

Odawara Castle ~ One of the first
places I visited when I arrived.

my news feed and line up a bunch of articles that other people have shared so that I can read them in succession. I find myself following interesting discussions or watching short films and documentaries on Youtube. Sometimes, if the fancy takes me, I'll find myself looking up random Japanese sentence structures to make sense of how its used. I often ask friends and acquaintances their opinions on matters of interest just to strike up interesting conversation. And after all of that, I might even end up forgetting but it won't stop me from looking things up again.

"I am not trusting"

This isn't a particularly new issue. Growing up, I had a hard time trusting people around the real me so I put on a mask and behaved neutrally. I only showed my true self to the small selection of friends that I trusted. Since I've grown, I'm more openly myself but I still don't trust people easily and since coming to Japan, I believe this has exploded exponentially. Japan is a society where people are not particularly open and honest about their thoughts and opinions. As a result, it's often difficult to guess who is genuine. I now prefer to take my time when getting to know new people. After all, it isn't uncommon to meet someone on one occasion and never hear from them again here. I don't like to feel like my time has been wasted so if I can keep them at a distance for a while, that is satisfying to me.

"I am worldly"

Japan is a homogeneous nation. So it's not unusual to be met with both suspicion and wonder. But based on the, at times, misinformed opinions of my hosts, I must say that growing up in London has made me very culturally aware. I've taught lessons and had students tell me that they despised Islam when what they should have said was that they disliked ISIS, the Islamic terrorist group. In some minds, there is no differentiation between the two. I've heard of cases where people have said they dislike the Chinese without having ever been to China or come into contact with Chinese people. I can freely form an opinion on my own personal experiences or even hazard a guess about a situation that I might not know about but in Japan, things are fairly regimented. And while I reckon there probably has been a shift in the last decade or so, it has been said that people are taught what to think here. There is only a right way and a wrong way. There is no grey area.

"I am not forgiving"

Growing up, I believed in second chances. I gave nearly all of my previous relationships a second chance and on each occasion, it just didn't work out. I forgave acquaintances and tried to start anew. I took a lot of crap and let people walk all over me; I'm still not except from the latter. But I think I have become even less forgiving over time. They say one of the greatest virtues is forgiveness but I think that because I've been let down of various occasions, I've now developed a "one strike and you're out" rule. And it could be anything as small as lending money, or wronging me at the post office. I don't like lending (or borrowing) money anyway, and I will file a complaint (yes, I've become one of those people). As a sign of my resilience, if the issue was particularly bad, I will reduce or cut off all contact altogether. No drama. No problem.

"I am self-sufficient"

Even though I have lived alone before, technically it wasn't really alone. I was at university, living in shared facilities with other people. And while I may have had my own space and my own responsibilities, something was always shared. When I arrived in Japan, my previous company set me up with house and home and provided me with a loan (which I repaid in full) to get me started. In my latest accommodation, while I had much help finding it, I pretty much fit the bill myself. I paid for the moving costs out of my own pocket. I've furnished it and I fit all the bills. I manage my money so that I'm able to save a little and play a little each month. I feel positively comfortable in both my living situation and day-to-day life.

"I am not patient"

I'm sure I've mentioned it before, but in Japan, people are punctual here. And they don't arrive on time; they arrive well before. During my first job, it was expected that I arrive at least 30 minutes before the start of my first lesson. In my current job, I arrive at least an hour early to prepare the lessons for the day. This has crossed over into my every day life. Whenever I meet friends or head to an event, I plan out my journey with Hyperdia and specify that time that my train will arrive. So when people are late, it really winds me up. An old friend of mine once said to me "what right do I have to waste someone else's time". I didn't really pay it much mind then, but I understand it completely now. I also understand that sometimes being late can't be helped (even I am late on occasion), but the selfish side of me wonders why those who are chronically late can't get with the picture.

"I am not maternal"

You would think that working with predominantly children for one year and then again sporadically for the time after that, that I'd be pretty well versed in children. And sure, I know

Is it weird that this does nothing for me?

what kids are like. They can be very good and they can be very. But I've realised recently that while the idea of having kids is still very much on the table, I am not particularly maternal. If a child is crying, I find the act of comforting them a little bit uncomfortable (but maybe it's because they are not my own). Younger children are often particularly difficult for me because nine times out of ten, they'd rather be doing what they want to do. I haven't quite figured out how to engage younger children because while they are children, they are still people who think and behave differently to one another. So while one kid may enjoy colouring, another kid might prefer something a little more active. And above all, I think I've grown to dislike pandering to children. I haven't forgotten that six-year-old girl who used to bawl when she lost at something but I'm still of the mentality that kids need to suck it up.

"I still have a lot to learn"

I had a look at the 4 stages of culture shock that foreigners are said to face when they move to another country and while I'm aware that I'm a long way off from the final stage (mastery), I think that I have days where I'm either in the Negotiation phase or in the Adjustment phase. Certainly, there are aspect of Japan that I find positively frustrating but on other days, I can't help but think how easy it feels to live here. And because this culture is not my own, I'm always going to come across something that is completely new to me. That's why I feel that I still have a lot to discover - both about Japan and myself. Because after all, nobody stops learning once they reach adulthood. And while I like to think that I'm very self-aware, I'm sure there are aspect of myself that I've yet to uncover or that might even change over time. And as a result, I'm looking forward to it.

The Japan Files ~ Question Time

It's very common that when you meet someone for the first time, there's always gonna be that general exchange of questions that people ask each other to get some perspective on the people they're talking to. As humans, we are social. We need conversation and common ground to form relationships or get to know each other. But whenever I meet a Japanese person for the first time, it isn't uncommon to come across the same pattern of questions every time, to the point where I can almost literally predict what is going to come out of their mouths. And it doesn't matter the age or gender. Because it seems that the vast majority of Japanese people tend to blend together as is the culture really. Though there are those that stray from the norm, Japan is an extremely conservative society where it's important to fit in. Differences, while apparent, are sometimes hard to come by. So allow me to introduce to you, my pattern of five; the questions that I have received the most since my arrival in Japan.

Where are you from?

Potentially, the most - if not the most common question that any Japanese person will ask upon meeting a foreigner for the first time. Foreigners are hard to come by. We make up less than 2% of the population and the majority of that two percent happens to come from neighbouring countries like South Korea or China. It is physically impossible to know where someone is from based on their appearance alone although it's a very typical thing to make assumptions. As a result, there seems to be a continuous interest in foreigner origins. But sadly, this question is a little bit too common for my taste so I've actually resorted to making people guess where I'm from to entertain myself. And I've had it all. People have assumed I'm American, African, Brazilian or Canadian. (I even had Indian once but I'm wondering if that person was serious). It seems that it's difficult for people to comprehend that a person that looks like me could be from a country like England. So I feel quite proud of myself when I open someone's eyes to the possibility for the first time.

How long have you been in Japan?

Recently, I've been getting this one a lot. I guess it's kind of a given though. I am not Japanese and as a result, the length of time I've been here is bound to be shorter than any Japanese person who was born and raised here. Maybe it's a way of gaging whether I'm a newbie or veteran. After all, newbies are expected to know virtually nothing about Japan. And veterans? Well, they're expected to know virtually nothing about Japan too. I usually get asked this one a lot at work so maybe it's a way of checking out my level of experience. But that says nothing really; for all they know, I could have taught English back in England as well.  If I'm honest, I'm not 100% sure about this. It could be actually be a foreshadowing of the next question...

How long will you stay in Japan?

To a lot of the locals, foreigners have an expiration date. And while various foreigners stay for long periods of time or make a life for themselves in Japan, there are a great many still who put a time stamp on their time here. Some decide to stay for a year and then head home, while others can only stay for a year due to visa restraints. Others stay for extended periods of time and then evidently decide to go home when they feel the time is right, while others just never leave. That said, because the locals are used to seeing foreigners come and go, it is often expected that we aren't in it for the long haul. That said, whenever I get asked this question, the response is always a shrug of the shoulders. I know it won't be forever but I really don't know how long I'm gonna be here. As it happens though, I quite like my life in Japan right now; I've always mentioned that it feels easy to live here; even without a firm grasp on the language. This brings me to the next question...

Can you speak Japanese?

I've always believed that it's important for people to speak the language of the country they are in. And I'm sure English speakers galore would agree that they expect people to speak English if they're going to be living in English speaking nations. But not all nations seem to agree with this notion. In Japan, it isn't uncommon for even the oldest fogey to know a little bit of English. But they still want to know whether you can communicate in the language and personally I don't see anything wrong with this question as it's usually assumed that foreigners cannot speak Japanese at all. But the more I'm asked this question, I'm starting to wonder if the answer to this question from the expectant Japanese perspective is only either "yes" or "no". I usually say "a little" because I do know a little but I'm starting to wonder if "a little" more of less translates into "no".

Why did you come to Japan?

A friend of mine once asked me why I was learning Japanese because Japanese is a language only spoken - for the most part - in Japan and can't really be used anywhere else. Therefore, it has made me consider that the reason people ask this question is a way of downplaying Japan. After all, modesty is extremely prevalent here.. But at the same time, I'm starting to wonder if people think I'm crazy for coming here. There seems to be a divine interest in all things non-Japanese. Or whether it's a way for people to hear others say good things about Japan. After all, the vast majority of foreigners came here or their own free will. They wouldn't have come here if they didn't like it. That said, my answer to this question is simple. I took an interest in Japan and the rest is history. In the same way that the kids are all obsessed with American musicians and K-pop idols, I chose Japan. This reason, and the fact that I wanted to teach.

~

Now all of these are perfectly acceptable questions. I suspect it wouldn't be uncommon to hear them had I chose to move to another country instead but the sheer frequency at which I have encountered these questions has lead me to do just that...question these questions. And what I've noted is that all of them have at least one thing in common. They continually reaffirm my status as a foreigner in Japan. Where are your from? Somewhere else. How long have you been in Japan? Not long. How long will you stay in Japan? Not forever. Can you speak Japanese? Not well. Why did you come to Japan? State your purpose. I believe it's been spoken about in other blogs - this notion of uchi-soto or "us versus them" but for a country that's keen to break down international barriers, I'm starting to wonder if they're going about it the right way.

Now where I'm from, when meeting someone for the first time, one of the first questions that generally pops up is "what's your name?". Since I've been here, I often ask this and find myself having to introduce myself without having received an enquiry in return. Further down the line, it's not uncommon to ask about someone's interests but (in reference to my earlier entry), this seems to rarely come about unless I've introduced the topic myself. 

Now perhaps its a clash of culture. Maybe it's uncommon here to pry too deeply into a stranger's state of affairs, especially if the subject is particularly controversial. But I don't understand how the question "How long will you stay in Japan?" takes precedence over "What do you do in your free time?". As I sit here evaluating it, the former question seems a little bit "cold". It's a surface question that seems to bare no interest in me as the individual. But again, Japan is not a country where people disclose their opinions freely and openly so it does not surprise me that the questions that I receive as a foreign seem to be more of the same.

I do wish they would change it up a bit however, but I guess I can't expect miracles in a country that is so very uniform. So foreigners with no clue about Japan - and even those with a clue - brace yourself.

It will get old.

Fast.

A Visit to the Doctor ~ The First

It was inevitable.

No matter how far across the world I'd decided to move, I was not going to be exempt from certain things. I was most definitely going to have to have good days. I was most definitely going to have bad days. And above all, I was most definitely going to get sick enough that I would need to take my first steps to go and see a doctor.

It was one of the things I'd been dreading since I'd arrived. Thus, before I came, I had stacked up on my British medicines and even asked my mother to send me over some goods when I ran out. But evidently, I ran out again. And the cough that had attached itself to my cold persisted long enough for me to become concerned. So I decided that it was time to put my health insurance to good use.

Once again, I consulted those more knowledgeable than myself and they pointed me in the direction of a website (which I unfortunately don't remember the name of) in which you can use in order to find an English speaking doctor. I called the number in question and the lady very helpfully called me back suggesting two that were relatively close to me. The one I was chose to go to was literally located about a two minute walk from my front door. So with that sorted, one morning before work, I took myself to the clinic in question and took yet another giant leap into the unknown.

Winter - as I reckon with anywhere in the world - is cold season. So when I entered into the establishment, I was met was half a dozen other people who were obviously there for the same reasons I was. I went to the front desk and as I had expected, the reception staff did not speak a lick of English so low and behold, I had to brave it and simply do my best. I told them my issue in broken Japanese and they gave me a form to fill out. All I could handle at the time was my name in Japanese and the rest of my details in English. They then proceeded to ask me a bunch of question which I barely understood if I'm honest but I got the general gist of it when the word "allergy" came up. So I figured they were merely asking me if I had any serious conditions that were worthy of note. I am very fortunate that I don't suffer with anything so this made things pretty easy. The form filled out, I took a seat.

Not two minutes later, one of the receptionists came to ask me another question. I had no idea what she was talking about so that very quickly ended that exchange. I watched as people entered and left the consultation room and eventually I was called in.

The doctor in question spoke fairly good English but he didn't particularly do much. We had a brief chat about my symptoms and then he stuck something in my nose to clear a relatively small blockage. After, he sprayed something into my throat and then he postulated that I probably had an inflammation somewhere. He then prescribed me various things for my symptoms, so much so that I ended up enquiring about the price,to which he suggested that I could choose whether to have him remove one of the items or not...hmm. In the end, I decided that one of the products probably wasn't necessary; after all, not even the doctor seemed to think it was required.

Fluffy toys included apparently...

In the middle of all this, the receptionist from earlier who had asked me something that I did not understand came in and had the doctor confirm what she was talking about. It turned out that someone from an insurance company in Tokyo had called saying that they would be sending someone to the establishment for a check up and they wanted to know if the person was me. Obviously I wasn't.

Afterward, they sent me outside where there was a bunch of machines that resembled the photo on the right. The chord had a face mask attached to the end of it and I was instructed to breath in the vapours for roughly 3 minutes. To this day, I'm not 100% sure what it was for but I'm guessing it might have been to clear my airwaves. Afterwards, I went back to reception, paid my dues and was instructed to head to the chemist next door.

I walked inside, handed over my prescription and after filling out my name, address and details for  second time, I sat down and waiting for my goods. The chemist dealing with me, returned with about five or six different drugs and I immediately saw the unease in his eyes. This unease turned into rapid fire Japanese and even after I asked him to slow down, he still persisted so I simply held on for the rollercoaster. Even though I didn't know what each one was for, I managed to understand how often I was to take each medicine which was helpful in a way I guess. I paid my dues again and went home. Collectively, I spent about 3000 yen.

It turned out that it's quite a common thing in Japan to be prescribed what I feel are ridiculous amounts of drugs. In the UK, one prescription is usually enough. And it usually does the trick. But over the 8 days that I took all these medicines, I have to say that not one of them helped me in the slightest. I still had the cough; I still felt under the weather and while not ridiculously expensive, I felt like I'd wasted my money on both doctor and medicine. As a result I will not be going there again.
I spoke to a friend of mine in Shiga who mentioned that he and his entirely family got quite sick

My prescription

but they were prescribed only antibiotics and within a few days they were right as rain. The doctor who I had seen felt that antibiotics weren't necessary at all but I can't help but wonder if a steady seven day course would have sorted me out in no time.

Nevertheless, I suppose I have to take in consideration that the strength of medicine in Japan is weaker than what I'm accustomed to. Whenever I've had an issue, whether it be a headache or a cold, I've yet to find anything that works. I tend to get migraines more often these days as well but I still have a steady supply of paracetamol from back home so that's something I have in check. I dread to find out what happens though when I run out however...

I've only had this sole experience with a doctor in Japan so it's not a lot to go on but I can't say that I am impressed. Hopefully, if I have to go again, the next doctor I see will be as competent at his job as he is at speaking English. But I think next time I go and see a doctor, I'm going to be quite direct. I would rather be prescribed something that works as oppose to ten or twelve things that don't.

The Japan Files ~ International Parties

I believe it's been said many times before but for the foreigner living in Japan, when attempting to make friends, it can go one of two ways. You're either inundated with popularity - girls and guys desperately clawing at you in order to bask in your presence because of that foreigner magic. Or you're met with the stone-cold reality that making genuine friendships in Japan is harder than it should be; maybe even that the natives are so intimidated by your "other-worldliness" that they flee at the mere sight of you. And sometimes there's a happy medium, but the longer I live here - and it hasn't been long mind you - the more I'm starting to realise that as with anywhere else in the world, it's really important to choose your friends. And choose them well.

The amount of friends I have in Japan is okay for me. I was never a social butterfly but obviously, I'd taken a giant leap by moving halfway across the country, which meant I had to start the process of building relationships all over again. So I turned to the sanctity that was the internet and started researching, and I turned to my coworkers who obviously knew more about my new city than I did. As a result, I was swiftly invited to a relatively common event for foreigners in Japan known as the international party.

The clue is in the name really but in Japan, these types of parties are designed to bring foreigners and Japanese people together to exchange culture, life and language. Sounds innocent enough. I recall a similar event at my university back home where all the international students were invited to such an event where they could meet and mingle with other international students so as not to feel entirely isolated in their new world. In Japan however, it's very easy to find yourself in familiar territory. We foreigners have found ways of finding each other and building support networks, whether it's through work or other means. We always find each other. But despite the 1000 to 1 ratio of Japanese people to foreigners living in Japan, there is still a little bit of a divide. And as a result, the international party and various other international or global events were born.

Now, I've not been to many of these parties but I do feel that they usually go one of two ways...

The English Opportunity Spectrum

Japan's first language is Japanese, I'm sure you're aware, but in order to take itself out of this Japanese mentality, over the last couple of decades or so, there has been a push for people to learn English in hopes that Japan - being so closed off from the rest of the world for so many years - might become a little bit more global. (And now, especially with The 2020 Olympics dawning, the necessity for English is probably going through the roof). But with English-speaking foreigners scarce in number, there is often very little opportunity to use English. So when there's an international party, it's not uncommon for those practising English to flock in large numbers. They're often breeding grounds for students of English in particular, looking to test their abilities. It has been my experience that a genuine interest in the person is often misplaced and that people talk for the sake of talking in English as oppose to having a conversation and just taking the time to get to know someone new. It often feels a little bit disingenuous.

The Undercover Dating Spectrum

It is no secret that foreign men are popular amongst the women in Japan. I have come across various women who are either curious, interested or hell-bent on dating a foreigner. Stories pollute the internet. And even though among the international parties, I've been to, there has been a mixed crowd, it isn't uncommon to find a lot more women in attendance. I do not mind my own company - on occasion, I crave it - but I have actually felt forgotten during one said event where I was actually the only foreign woman and I bore witness to my male counterparts cavorting with members of the opposite sex in a manner that I could only really describe as international speed dating. Heck, some international events actually promote themselves as such events, some even reduce the price for foreigners and women to gauge more interest. It is no secret that Japan wants to know its foreign residence but I'm presuming there are those that would rather get to know each other on a more intimate level. But, again, I suspect it's inevitable if your throw men and women together in a room (and especially with alcohol lighting the flames as well).


That said, I'm not trying to dissuade people from attending these events. If I had to pick a relatively safe place to meet people and make friends, I would suggest attending one of these. It's reduces the sleaze factor that is commonly found at clubs and bars, but also almost entirely eradicates the anonymity and uncertainty that people come across when using the internet to form relationships. International parties are also time-restricted so even if there is alcohol involved, over-drinking (and general stupidity as a result) at the party establishment is unlikely.

Recently, I've actually found an international party that I really enjoy going to but this is because in my opinion, it actually fits the definition of an international event. I walked in during my first time and came across not only Japanese people, but people from all over the world, all sharing a common language, but coming from different walks of life. (There were still aspect of The English Opportunity Spectrum lurking about but I suppose I can't expect anything less from an English school). I actually ended up forming friendships at that event and since then, I've returned a couple more times and fully intend to do so in the future.

As a result, I think as with anything, it's all about trial and error. It's important to find something that suits you and I think as I get older and deeper into my experience of living and working overseas, I'm looking at the important things. As I might have mentioned before, I came to Japan alone and I knew how important a support network was. At my previous company however, I pretty much walked into a really big one. As I am now, my current company is much smaller and even though they are like a second family, I'm aware that they each have their own families and responsibilities that must come first and consequently, they cannot always be a crutch for me.

Unfortunately, I cannot speak much for the countryside but I do know that the bigger the city, the more the variety. And this not only goes for people and international parties obviously, but general activities and opportunities as well. So if I had to give someone advice, I would definitely say put yourself out there. But a with any social event, have your wits about you. Japan is a wonderful place, but it's still important to be at least a little bit savvy.

Black Hair ~ Abroad and Beyond

If you’re unfamiliar with the black community then you may not be aware that our hair is a big deal for us. We’ve spent centuries trying to make-do with, adapt and find ways of maintaining our hair, especially within communities that may not necessarily produce the commodities and methods we might have needed to make this easier. Nevertheless, there is big business in black hair. Hair products and hair maintenance can get really expensive but black folk aside, all women the world over wear their hair like they wear they clothes – in a way that represents, defines and makes them feel beautiful.

For me, this particular aspect of my life has been a struggle. I never really got into hair. Granted, I had a mother who liked me to look presentable and who took care of that during the earlier years of my life. But as I got older, I became experimental and tried different styles, whether just to fit in or adorn what I thought was acceptable at the time. What all these years, however, had in common was that someone else was doing my hair. And as a result, it wasn’t until recently, upon going abroad, that I became forced to learn how to maintain it myself.

During my university years, I got very close with a girl who introduced me to a new way of looking at hair and it made me re-evaluate all of the things I’d put myself through with regards to it. I’d been to hairdressers in the past who would comb my hair so violently that it made me want to cry. I remember a Jamaican woman saying to me that you had to experience pain to make your hair pretty. I recall walking into a hair salon and requesting them to texturise my hair, only to feel so intimidated that I allowed them to convince me to hot comb it instead. The hairdresser burnt my scalp continuously but I was too afraid to say anything. I remember sitting down for an entire day straight while two women plaited my hair with extensions. The salon was full of kids and on occasion, they would stop to openly have casual discussions with friends and boyfriends all the while wasting my time and money.

Since those days, I have developed a prejudice for black hair salons and up until recently hadn’t set foot in one for over six years. I developed the opinion that black hair salons and the like sucked at customer service and had absolutely no business sense. How could they possibly when they’d set up shop next to each other only to close down, relocate or vanish completely wondering why they weren’t bringing in enough money to keep themselves afloat.

When I’d made my decision to go to Japan, I had relaxed hair but I made the choice to go natural knowing that I would most likely have to learn to take care of my hair myself. As Japan is over 97% Japanese, it would be a difficult to find someone to take care of my hair and I also didn’t really want any strangers in my hair either - there were very few people I trusted not to rip out my hair. Within my first year of flying solo, I did pretty well. I wasn’t great at taking care of my hair – even now I’m not. I wasn’t’ versatile with my hairstyles but my hair grew; it wasn’t falling out of my head. But evidently, as with everybody, I got that itch. I missed having my hair cornrowed and even though I can cornrow, I haven’t really learnt how to do it in my own hair so I bit the bullet and sought out someone else.

The internet pretty much connected me immediately to many resources. Despite the relatively small black community in Japan, we are about and it wasn’t long before I found a hairdresser. I booked a month in advance and thought, perhaps a little naively, that the garbage that I was used to dealing with back home would be different in Japan.

Needless to say, I travelled many miles to get to this hairdresser and phoned on the morning to ask for directions to the establishment (I was only around the corner at the time, and I was also on time) only to be told that they had no record of me on their books. I was livid. In the end, I had to come back at a later time than I had initially scheduled to get my hair done as the salon owner had to make a few phone calls. My hair was done well but when I did eventually come to take it out, I also ended up pulling out pieces of my own hair as well so needless to say, I will not be going back.

Fast forward to now and I get that itch again – you think I would learn - but I made it a rule not to put up with rubbish. I contact a woman who keeps posting advertisements all over the internet. She assures me that she’ll get back to me the following day and to this day, I’m still waiting for her to get back to me. Now it may seem like a small issue – I could have merely contacted her myself – but I’ve started to realise that promoting a service, sort of makes you a business person. And in business, it’s really important to do as you say you will. In Japan, when a Japanese company says they’ll call you back, they call you back. In fact, any decent organisation would do the same. That simple mistake says to me that this woman is unreliable so I will not be contacting her again either.

Even in Japan, the black hairdressers or hair doers here are not doing much to deter my preconceptions of them. I’m not sure why I thought another country would make things different but I do believe in giving chances. That said, I think ultimately, if I’m to avoid disappointment, I should probably simply learn how to cornrow my hair myself. In fact, to any black woman, looking to live abroad, while it is nice to have someone else take care of your hair for you, this would be my advice. Learn to do your hair yourself. Certainly, it’s time consuming but it’ll cost you less overall, you’ll avoid disappointment and feel a great sense of reward knowing that you can put together your own hair on your own.

End of an Era ~ Tribute to Hiroshima

Sad times.

For in a matter of days, I will be jumping ship and moving to a new city in a new prefecture, thousands of miles away. But while I have made it known that I would be moving to Hiroshima, I realise that I haven’t really taken to time out to talk about the city in itself. Famously, it’s known as one of the places where the Americans dropped their bomb but in the year that I have been here (and that year has flown by) I have come to enjoy and cherish Hiroshima as my home. It has become more than just a piece of Japanese history but a piece of mine as well. So today I am going to toast Hiroshima in all its greatness.

 Fuku-Chan

I arrived in Hiroshima at night and spent the rest of it in a hotel but the following day as I began the process of moving into my apartment, the very first restaurant I was introduced to was this little number. Hiroshima is famous for okonomiyaki or its original style of Japanese pancakes which, unlike others, are made with yakisoba noodles. I immediately fell in love with this style of okonomiyaki and would often bring visiting friends and guests to this restaurant at every opportunity. I visited other okonomiyaki restaurants but none could compare to the taste that was Fuku Chan. It’s also conveniently located just outside Hiroshima station and often gets busy. I would highly recommend this restaurant. They boast an English menu and their okonomiyaki with cheese is simply to die for.

Peace Memorial Park

This is probably one of the most famous areas within Hiroshima city. Within walking distance is the equally famous Atomic Bomb Dome. One of the very few buildings to partially survive the bomb all those years ago. The park itself is stunning, littered with various artefacts and tributes to that fateful day. It is also the location of the Peace Memorial Museum which I would both highly recommend and also warn that you should brace yourself. I went in expecting to be a tourist, snap a few photos and what have you. I came out feeling extremely heavy hearted. I actually went in a second time, discovered some new stuff and felt equally as heavy-hearted as the first time. I will not be going in there again but it’s definitely something I would say everyone should see at least once.

Hondori Street

This shopping haven is the busiest and longest shopping strip in Hiroshima city. As I lived within easy commute, every once in a while I would pop to Hondori for my shopping needs. Obviously, shopping for clothing in Japan is relatively difficult for me but Hondori housed a few known brands such as H&M and Uni Qlo so I’d find myself frequently there. It also has quite a few restaurants and other forms of entertainment. It was also here where I got my iPhone and where I went to my first family restaurant, hilarious at the time, known as, Bikkuri Donkey (Surprise Donkey). Nearby is the famous meet-up spot known as Alice Garden and a relatively large Don Quijote – one of the only places where I would walk in with the intention of only buying one item, and end up coming out with a bag full of stuff. It gets insanely busy on weekends – obviously – so I preferred going there in the week.

Round One

I discovered this place a little late but Round One is a giant arcade conveniently located in the vicinity of Hondori street. It possesses eleven floors of gaming goodness. UFO catchers, pachinko slots and other general arcade games litter the first couple of floors. Mario anyone? Upper levels boast darts (which I’ve come to really enjoy), billiards, table tennis, golf and even a batting hut. Everything else is bowling and karaoke so if you fancy a fun night out – Round One closes ridiculously late – I would highly recommend this place. I had actually intended to become a member but circumstances being what they are, I held off. If I find another one however, you can bet I’m gonna be signing up.

Aeon Mall

This giant mall was located about twenty minutes walk from my house and like Hondori, has many shops and other forms of entertainment. The name was recently changed to Aeon Mall but veterans know it, nostalgically, as Diamond City. When I first went to the supermarket here, I spent over three hours inside, finding my way around and figuring out which products were what. Later, I would buy my heater, fan and a couple other small appliances here. Once, I bought a month’s worth of shopping and carried all eight bags and my rucksack back home. I’m sure it must have looked a little strange me carrying all those bags and believe me, it’s not something I will ever attempt again. I am quite strong but even my body has its limits. On other occasions, I would meet friends for meals, shop or watch movies. I was very fortunate that this place was so nearby.

Fitting that I snapped this
at night considering that
I both arrived in Hiroshima
and left it at this time of the
day.

Hiroshima Station

Why would I consider Hiroshima station worth a mention? Well, if there was always a place I was passing through, it was Hiroshima station. Whether I was travelling to work or meeting up with friends, Hiroshima station was the place. I also became a big fan of the Starbucks here and would frequent it after I had my Japanese classes in the afternoon. Not all the staff were as friendly as those in the afternoon but they alone made me a loyal customer. The only thing that annoyed me about Hiroshima station was the constant construction works. It made travelling from one side of the station to the other take five minutes longer than it should have. Besides this, Hiroshima station was something of a home base for me. I have a lot of memories here. 

Hiroshima City International Center

In addition to the Hiroshima International Center (HiC) that’s located in the Hondori area, both institutes boast one thing in common – free Japanese lessons. Anywhere in the world, English is big business and you’d be hard pressed to find free English lessons in the UK unless you know where to look but in Japan, for the clueless foreigner, Japanese study is encouraged. I attended lessons for a year and learnt a lot from the volunteers that taught here. Though HiC also boasts free lessons and one on one sessions but I found the City Center a lot more fruitful overall and that’s why for me, it’s worthy of a mention

Nagarekawa

Generally considered a bit of a bad area by the locals, Nagarekawa is Hiroshima’s evening district. People generally come here to party. This area is littered with Host and Hostess clubs, bars, restaurants, and after a certain time, many drunk people. I generally came here to go to the very few foreigner heavy night clubs and/or bars. There is also an American style hole in the wall known as New York New York where I got to eat a chilly cheese dog for the first time (at around four ‘o clock in the morning). I’m not sure how genuine of a replica it was in comparison to the US, but it was damn good. So yes, if you are a party animal, Nagarekawa is the place.

Poplar

Poplar is a conbini chain and while I prefer Seven Eleven because the food and what have you is generally better, there was one particular branch of Poplar that held a place in my heart. Located about two minutes from my front door, I would often pop here in the evening, after work or if I fancied something a little bit sweet (or savoury). The customer service at this particular Poplar was always on point. The guys working here weren’t particularly chatty with me but I liked that they didn’t treat me any differently to anyone else. They were always polite to me. Even that time when I came in out of the rain asking for an umbrella (kasa) and made the mistake of saying “keys” (kaigi) instead. As a result, I was always in there so thanks for the service boys. Maybe I’ll be back some day.

~

So, I’m sure some of this seems a little strange, but these were the highlights from my time in Hiroshima. These places will forever stand out for the moments and the memories I made here. Thus, for anyone looking to teach abroad in Japan, I say – forget Tokyo. Sure, it’s the most happening place in Japan. You’ll never be bored there as you’re spoilt for choice but you’ll certainly be out of pocket because Tokyo is not cheap. Hiroshima city is a fairly big city in itself boasting over a million people. But I saved a helova lot of money here simply because the standard of living is cheaper – and this includes the occasion trip to other prefectures, and frequent weekends out with friends. It’s also a very chill lifestyle. I only really saw it at its busiest during a baseball game (I never got to go to one unfortunately) and during a national holiday. Nevertheless, it made me appreciate its relaxed nature compared to the craziness of Tokyo – and heck, even London. People are friendly – not everybody but such is life; you’ll come across many a tourist and many an opportunity.

Hiroshima was epic. But now I guess it’s time for me to begin the next adventure.

Moving House ~ The First

Well, I’ve finally done it. It took hours of scouting the internet, sending in CVs and only six interviews, but I finally managed to find a new job. The perks include smaller classes, a British boss and the opportunity to teach adults. 

The con – it’s all the way in Odawara, Kanagawa so I’ve had to begin the process of relocating.

Now it’s no secret to foreigners and Japanese people alike that moving house here is no walk in the park. Japan is a relatively nice and honest place to live but one of the hardest things to do here is to actually relocate. There are so many hoops to jump through and con artists out there keen to cheat you out of your money, so you have to have your wits about you. It’s easy to get swindled so it’s best to clue yourself in.

~

Typically, in order to move house, you are generally expected to pay the following things:

First month’s rent. This is a given.

Security deposit. Also a given. And it’s refundable at the end of contract.

Agency commission. Understandable. However, sometimes an agency fee can also equate to a month’s rent.

Key money. This is basically gift money for the landlord and is always non-refundable. Say goodbye to another month’s rent.

Fire insurance. You know – in case you set the house on fire. I would have thought this was covered by the security deposit but nope.

Maintenance. This is usually added on to your monthly rent. It’s usually only a couple thousand yen but it mounts every month. For the Brits out there, I guess this could be equated to council tax. For everyone else, maybe building maintenance?

Guarantor. In the case that you can’t find a suitable guarantor for your apartment – the person who fits the bill if you can’t – the estate agent might suggest a third party organisation to be a guarantor for you. And of course, they need to be paid.

Lock exchange. You know – to change the locks. I don’t really see the point of this one.

Renewal. So moving into an apartment is one thing but if you want to continue living there, sometimes you’re required to pay a renewal fee too. Another month’s rent.

Cleaning. And if you do decide to move out, don’t think you’re getting out too easily either. Some places will charge an extortionate cleaning fee so they can make it fresh and nice for the next tenant.

~

Now obviously, this is the worst case scenario and I’m sure there have been circumstances where some people haven’t had to pay all of the above but sometimes, they have to. So be prepared to part with a lot of money.

I of course, went the foreigner route at first and searched online via the infamous Gaijinpot website but Odawara is a smaller city and Gaijinpot only really possesses decent housing in and around the Tokyo area. The only houses they had for Odawara were, what is referred to as a 1K. What this kind of apartment entails is one big room with bathroom and tiny kitchenette. Having spent my first year in exactly that, I wanted something bigger so in the end, I went the Japanese route. I found a website called AtHome, perused some houses and found one that I was interested in.

If I’m honest, I didn’t actually do the leg work. I’m based in Hiroshima and Kanagawa is far so my new boss and his wife decided to check the house out for me. The house was indeed lovely. It was a 2DK on the ground floor with a balcony – or two roomed apartment with kitchen and bathroom area. On the website, it had assured me that there was no key money or deposit to be included and the price was reasonable. I had also been warned to expect a headache. And headache we got.

When it came to discussing the price, the “estate agent” began rattling off a whole bunch of different things. It turned out that there was not only a deposit (not what the website had said) but there was a deposit to reserve it as well (of which would be refundable if I decided not to take the house). There was maintenance (which I expected), a fire deposit (of which I hadn’t expected), and a ridiculously pricey cleaning fee. According to my new boss, it actually took them a while to get the total figure out of the estate agent but it was ridiculous and it made them absolutely livid.

I wasn’t there in person so I couldn’t feel the aggravation per se, but I know that it took a lot of back and forth negotiations and some getting angry to sort it all out. In the end, we’d found out that the guy from AtHome was simply a middle man between us and the actual estate agent. When they had spoken to the real guy in charge, it had turned out that the price to “reserve” the house had been a lie. It was actually free to reserve and the total price to pay was dropped to something more reasonable. The cleaning fee was still ridiculous however and the deposit was still present despite the website saying something else.

Fortunately however, it really is who you know. One of my boss’ students happened to be in real estate and had a house for rent. They went to check that place out. It was also a 2DK and the guy had offered to throw in a bike and a stove as a gift. The house was also lovely and unlike the previous one was on the second floor – which I actually prefer. Discussions for the price were negotiated, guarantor was sorted and I will sign for that house on at the end of the week.

Headache terminated.

Since then, I checked back on the AtHome website, and the apartment I had been looking at has now vanished. It turned out they were going to renovate it and I wouldn’t have been able to move in until December which is too late for me. I personally think this was just a cop out – a way for them not have to deal with us anymore – but personally, I think I got the better deal.

I’ve also spoken to a number of people who have moved house in Japan. All mention having problems or spending more money than they had to. One guy mentioned being told he had to pay for something called a Drain Outlet fee by which they sterilise the drain outlet. According to him however – having worked in real estate himself – the price they charge and the job that’s done do not add up so he refused to pay that and instead had them clean the air conditioner to which they obliged. It makes me consider how important some of these fees really are if some estate agents are happy to bend the rules.

~

In preparation for the signing, I’ve been told I’ll need to following things:

Residence card. All foreigners who intend to live, work and study in Japan are issued a residence card. By law, we must carry it with us at all times.

Passport. A given.

Health insurance card. I’m not sure why this is needed – especially because I’ve never used mine.

Bank book. A given.

Inkan. This is a stamp with my surname in katakana printed on it. In the UK, we sign for things. In Japan, if you have one, you use an inkan.

Juminhyou. Apparently this is residence record attained from the Ward Office where I registered my current address. I’ve been told it doesn’t take long to obtain it but I’m expecting hurdles because of my limited Japanese ability.

Payment. Obviously.

~

As I now almost have an apartment to move into, I’ve also looked into removal arrangements. It was suggest to me to use Kuroneko to send my stuff to my new address as I haven’t much stuff. There was only one person who could speak English in the whole of my area so after a week of not receiving an email, I contacted them via phone and managed to get things underway. So for the most part, I’m almost ready to go. I have some loose ends to tie up in Hiroshima with my current place of residence and my company of course, but I’m hoping everything will go smoothly. I don’t think I can take another headache.

Wish me luck.